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Thanks to S. Forest King

Socialism: You have two cows. You keep one, but must give the other to your neighbor.

Communism: You have two cows. The government takes both and provides you with milk.

Fascism: You have two cows. The government takes both and sells you the milk.

Bureaucracy: You have two cows. The government takes them, shoots one, milks the other, pays you for the milk, and then pours it down the drain.

Dictatorship: You have two cows. The government takes both, then shoots you.

Capitalism: You have two cows. You sell one and buy a bull.

Democracy: You have two cows. The government taxes you to the point that you must sell them both to support a man in a foreign country who has only one cow, which was a gift from your own government.

Corporation: You have two cows. You lay one off, force the other to produce the milk of four cows, then act surprised when it drops dead.

California: You have two cows. The state tells you how to milk your cows, when to milk your cows, how much to milk your cows and the most that you can charge for the milk. You go broke and sell the cows. The state calls you greedy and blames you for the current milk shortage.

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